The First Five Divorce Mistakes That Cost Couples Thousands
- Beth Carrier
- Oct 22
- 2 min read
Divorce is emotional, but it’s also financial — and the wrong early choices can drain your savings fast.
Most couples don’t realize how many divorce mistakes happen before anyone even files.
If you’re considering divorce but haven’t yet called an attorney, this is your moment to pause, breathe, and learn what not to do.
These are the five divorce mistakes I see most often — and how to avoid them.
1. Hiring Attorneys Before You Have a Plan
When fear takes over, people rush to “lawyer up.” The problem? That decision alone can set a combative tone and create instant financial strain.
Two retainers later, you’ve spent thousands before you’ve even agreed on what you’re fighting about.
In mediation, you spend that same energy — and a fraction of that money — building solutions, not case files.
Learn how structured mediation can simplify decisions in the Divorce Decision Blueprint.
2. Letting Emotions Drive Financial Decisions
Anger, guilt, or resentment lead to some of the costliest divorce mistakes.
Keeping the house when it’s not financially sustainable.
Refusing to sell because “it’s home.”
Agreeing to imbalanced settlements just to “be done.”
These emotional money traps can quietly cost tens of thousands — and delay your ability to truly move forward.
A skilled mediator helps you separate emotion from math, creating agreements that make financial and emotional sense.
3. Ignoring Tax Implications
Divorce doesn’t happen in a financial vacuum. Property transfers, asset divisions, and even alimony can all have tax consequences.
Capital gains from selling a home or investments can surprise you if you’re not looking ahead to tax season.
As both a Certified Professional Mediator and a former real estate and mortgage professional, I help clients anticipate and plan around these realities — so they don’t face an unexpected bill a year later.
4. Refusing to Share Information
Transparency saves money.
When one spouse hides or withholds information — bank statements, debts, investments — it triggers distrust, which triggers lawyers, which triggers bills.
In mediation, full disclosure is a requirement. Once everything’s on the table, you can make decisions based on facts instead of assumptions.
5. Assuming Court Is the Only Way
One of the biggest divorce mistakes is assuming the courtroom is your only option.
In reality, most divorces don’t need a judge — they need a plan.
Mediation lets couples decide how to divorce before the system decides for them.It’s structured, private, and focused on resolution — not retaliation.
Final Thoughts on Avoiding Common Divorce Mistakes
The smartest move you can make right now? Slow down.
Take time to understand your choices, your finances, and your future before you hire anyone.
Avoiding these five divorce mistakes can save you thousands — and help you keep what truly matters: your peace, your power, and your perspective.
