Why Keeping the House After Divorce Might Not Be the Victory You Think
- Beth Carrier
- Jul 22
- 2 min read
When couples come to me to mediate their divorce, one of the first big debates I hear is: ‘I want to keep the house.’ For many people, keeping the house after divorce feels like the ultimate win — but is it really?
And I get it. The house feels like the anchor. It feels familiar and stable — especially when kids are involved. But here’s the truth: keeping the house isn’t always the smart play. Sometimes it’s not even a win at all.
Let’s talk about why rushing to claim the house can backfire — and how mediation helps you weigh your options and make a decision you won’t regret.
A House Comes With a Lot More Than Memories
Yes, you know your mortgage payment now. But can you really handle it — plus property taxes, insurance, utilities, and maintenance — on just your post‑divorce income? For many newly divorced parents, what seemed doable on paper turns into a stressful scramble in real life. And selling later under pressure? That rarely works in your favor.
It Might Not Be Best for the Kids
I know you want to keep the kids in their home and schools — of course you do. But remember: kids adapt better than we give them credit for. What they need most is two parents who are financially stable and less stressed — not one parent house‑poor and stretched thin trying to cling to the family home.
What Will You Have to Give Up to Keep It?
Here’s the part many people don’t consider: keeping the house often means giving up something else — cash, retirement funds, future flexibility. The house might feel like a win today, but at what cost to your long‑term security?
How Mediation Helps You Decide Whether to Keep the House After Divorce
What I love about mediation is that it gives you the space to really look at the numbers, talk through creative options, and make the choice that works best for everyone. Maybe keeping the house makes sense. Maybe selling and splitting the proceeds sets you both up for a better future. Either way, the choice is yours — not the court’s.
Final Thoughts
Your home holds a lot of memories — but don’t let nostalgia cloud your judgment about what’s truly best for your future and your kids. In mediation, we can work together to make sure you walk away with clarity, dignity, and a plan that actually works for your life.
If you’re ready to talk through your options and create a plan that truly works for your family, schedule your free consultation with me today — let’s figure this out together.
